happy early birthday to my late grandmother!
jokes that i said and things that she said that are funnier than the jokes that i said
dear friends, family, fans, fellow folks, friends, and more friends,
i’m grateful that you’re here.
thank you for being here and being you.
and now, for some jokes and thoughts all inspired by or involving interactions with my late grandma iris whose birthday is next week!
A) the Application trail:
"i'm finishing up my degree in applied math."
"will you get a job in that field?"
"no."
"why not?"
"i applied the math."
i shared this on social media a few years ago and my grandma responded with these two comments:
”More truth than joke!!”
and
”Myq has a Bachelors in Philosophy and a Masters in Linguistics and he's a comedian.”
it’s true! i also got a minor in math, because i applied the math to see how difficult it would have been to get a major in it. the good news: my graduate degree is technically in “Applied Linguistics” which sounds like a fancy way of describing “studying talking,” and as a comedian, i would say that i have been and continue to be a student of talking. thanks for listening!
B) Better and Better:
i'm staying at an air b&b so nice...
HOW NICE IS IT?
it's so nice, i washed my hands with lavender mouthwash that i thought was soap.
i shared THIS on social media a few years back, and my grandma responded with this comment:
”Better than rinsing your mouth with soap!”
she’s right!
she was a wise woman!
maybe she’s the reason i've learned to look for the positive side of things!
PS if i said that to her, i can just imagine her voice clearly saying “yeah right!”
which is another positive side of this thing!
that i can still imagine her voice so clearly!
boom!
C) Closing it out:
if you're stressed about the election, it can be helpful to remember that we'll all be dead in 1000 years except maybe super rich people.
i shared THAT on social media just before the 2016 presidential election (though i feel like it could be timeless!) and my grandmother responded with THIS comment:
”or me? By tomorrow.”
funny! savage! and thankfully, wrong!
she lived to see another four birthdays after saying that!
super grateful for the 91+ years that she lived, and for all the beautiful jokes and meaningful truths she shared with me and the world.
no joke there! just a meaningful truth!
and that’s all the grandma iris fun for right now! now, for questions!
1) how are you doing? what is new and good? how is your heart?
2) do you have living grandparents? any fun stories about them?
3) do you have non-living grandparents? any fun stories about THEM?
4) do you have a non-grandparent like iris in your life? any fun… etc?
5) how are you doing NOW?
finally, here are some places i’ll be performing in the coming days/years/eons!
— NYC, various places between now and December 17*
— LA, various places between December 20-22*
— Sacramento, CA on December 23
— Mill Valley, CA on December 26
— Santa Rosa, CA on December 29
— Scotts Valley, CA on December 30
— San Rafael, CA on December 31
— Minneapolis, MN on January 10-13
— Des Moines, IA on January 20
— Ogden, UT on January 26-27
— Boise, ID on January 28
— Milwaukee, WI on March 15-16
— Lafayette, LA on April 18
* want more specific info for any of those? comment or message and i’ll let you know!
FINALLY finally, here’s my grandma iris and me. i’m the one on the right.
love and thanks to you and yours and all, all!
