Tomorrow is my grandmother Laurah’s 2nd death anniversary. She died at age 96, and I’m happy for all the time we had, but still a little incredulous, like, but why couldn’t we have just had more time? I love and miss her every day. She was the best grandma to me. Very loving. Very soft hands. Very wise. She spoke in poetry, and old adages, and her laugh sounded like a wind chime. I love her so much. Thanks for sharing your grandma’s memory.
i once met a woman whose husband of 54 years had just died, and i said something like "wow, such a long time together!" and she said something like "yes, and i would have loved more." and i get it!
i'm grateful for everyone who gets to experience any kind of love like this, that is abundant and gratitude-inducing and also it would be great if there were just a little (or infinite) more!
Thank you for sharing, Myq. I fear the day I have to say goodbye to someone I’m so close to like you’ve had to. I know their memory will continue to live with me, and I am fortunate to be able to spend the time I have with them now. Your post shows me how people stay with us even after they’ve moved on, and it was beautiful to hear you reminiscing on both the joy of the memories and the challenge of grief.
thank you for these kind and thoughtful words, chris!
they say that grief is the price we pay for love, and in my experience, even though grief can be challenging and big and hard and lots of things, the love is worth it.
all the best to you and your loved ones. i hope you have a life full of wonderful meaningful connections! thank you again for sharing your words here.
thank you for reminding me to appreciate the times i've gotten to play scrabble with my grandma. i'm v blessed to have all my grandparents in my life still (i am 25! i am astonished) and i hope to keep them a part of mine even as they inevitably pass.
it feels a bit uncomfortable to think/talk about death and loss here as someone who's really only experienced it through pets (who are beloved companions like humans ofc), but your writings about your grandma iris (and her wonderful insight and wit!) resonate with me greatly. thank you for sharing 💖
My grandma also lived into her nineties and passed away from natural causes in March, but it was in 2008. I've been thinking about her a lot lately because she had a number of hip replacement surgeries, and I just had my hip replaced. I've been laying in bed a lot thinking about the summer of 2000, 24 years ago when I stayed at her house for the summer as she recovered from her last hip replacement and I helped out around the house and getting groceries. It was the summer between high school and college for me (yes, I'm young for a hip replacement, I know), and a much simpler time. That's summer I got my first cellphone and she would call me when I was upstairs and she was downstairs which she thought was amazing technology. Life was pretty nice that summer. I would get up and make her tea and breakfast, help her around the house, a visiting aid and nurse would come and stay with her when I went to work as a lifeguard. I rode my bike the work and back. I'd come home to make lunch for her and we'd eat together, then I'd go back to work, come home and make dinner for us. That was the first summer I went vegan too which she was very skeptical about, but ultimately accepted about me. I'd drive her big, brown, boxy Volvo that was as old as I was to the grocery store and get groceries for us. And we'd spend evenings watching old British sitcoms on PBS like Keeping Up Appearances. I can still hear the sound of her laughing at the Bucket woman when she'd say "it's pronounced bouquet" in a British accent, when it was clearly spelled Bucket.
In many ways, my hip replacement is not my grandmother's hip replacement. The technology and surgical techniques have advanced a lot in 24 years, so much so that I walked after waking up from surgery (with a walker, but still, walking on my new joint), and I didn't stay in the hospital, I went home the same day. I dont have nearly the restrictions on movement that she had and I will recover to walk and do a lot of things for myself much faster. Also, my grandma didn't have a smartphone or an internet full of hilarious cat videos to distract her if she woke up in the middle of the night. Nor did she have Myq Kaplan's substack which is why I'm writing this now because I woke up in the middle of the night as I recover.
The love from a grandma is very special and I think our grandmas had some things in common based on what I've read on this Substack. They were very loving and supportive. Though mine didn't have a sign about being nice or getting out, she had a sign, that I inherited that said, "Be reasonable, do it my way," which is a tongue in cheek joke for both of us as we were/are both very logical and thoughtful people with strong opinions.
Anyway, I just thought I'd share that about my Grandma Marie. I think she would have gotten along with Grandma Iris. Maybe they're hanging out, drinking tea in the afterlife.
This is beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing it. I love “Be reasonable, do it my way.” I think Iris would have loved it as well. Grandma Marie sounds wonderful. The only reason they might not be drinking tea in the afterlife right now (the ONLY reason) is that Iris was strongly on Team Coffee. She thought tea was only for when you were sick. But maybe that applies to when you’re dead also? “You’ll find me drinking tea over my dead body!” I can hear her say. So, probably that is what’s happening, then. Regardless, thank you again so much for sharing all of this, friend. I hope your hip heals well, and I appreciate this beautiful story of love. Thank you!
Tomorrow is my grandmother Laurah’s 2nd death anniversary. She died at age 96, and I’m happy for all the time we had, but still a little incredulous, like, but why couldn’t we have just had more time? I love and miss her every day. She was the best grandma to me. Very loving. Very soft hands. Very wise. She spoke in poetry, and old adages, and her laugh sounded like a wind chime. I love her so much. Thanks for sharing your grandma’s memory.
thank YOU for sharing YOUR grandma's memory.
"She spoke in poetry" is itself beautiful poetry!
i once met a woman whose husband of 54 years had just died, and i said something like "wow, such a long time together!" and she said something like "yes, and i would have loved more." and i get it!
i'm grateful for everyone who gets to experience any kind of love like this, that is abundant and gratitude-inducing and also it would be great if there were just a little (or infinite) more!
much love, friend!
Thank you for sharing, Myq. I fear the day I have to say goodbye to someone I’m so close to like you’ve had to. I know their memory will continue to live with me, and I am fortunate to be able to spend the time I have with them now. Your post shows me how people stay with us even after they’ve moved on, and it was beautiful to hear you reminiscing on both the joy of the memories and the challenge of grief.
thank you for these kind and thoughtful words, chris!
they say that grief is the price we pay for love, and in my experience, even though grief can be challenging and big and hard and lots of things, the love is worth it.
all the best to you and your loved ones. i hope you have a life full of wonderful meaningful connections! thank you again for sharing your words here.
I love you & I love my mom on this sad anniversary (thought I was ok but maybe later) 🥲
i love you!
thank you for reminding me to appreciate the times i've gotten to play scrabble with my grandma. i'm v blessed to have all my grandparents in my life still (i am 25! i am astonished) and i hope to keep them a part of mine even as they inevitably pass.
it feels a bit uncomfortable to think/talk about death and loss here as someone who's really only experienced it through pets (who are beloved companions like humans ofc), but your writings about your grandma iris (and her wonderful insight and wit!) resonate with me greatly. thank you for sharing 💖
thank YOU for sharing, and for receiving.
i appreciate your thoughtfulness and gratitude and care!
My grandma also lived into her nineties and passed away from natural causes in March, but it was in 2008. I've been thinking about her a lot lately because she had a number of hip replacement surgeries, and I just had my hip replaced. I've been laying in bed a lot thinking about the summer of 2000, 24 years ago when I stayed at her house for the summer as she recovered from her last hip replacement and I helped out around the house and getting groceries. It was the summer between high school and college for me (yes, I'm young for a hip replacement, I know), and a much simpler time. That's summer I got my first cellphone and she would call me when I was upstairs and she was downstairs which she thought was amazing technology. Life was pretty nice that summer. I would get up and make her tea and breakfast, help her around the house, a visiting aid and nurse would come and stay with her when I went to work as a lifeguard. I rode my bike the work and back. I'd come home to make lunch for her and we'd eat together, then I'd go back to work, come home and make dinner for us. That was the first summer I went vegan too which she was very skeptical about, but ultimately accepted about me. I'd drive her big, brown, boxy Volvo that was as old as I was to the grocery store and get groceries for us. And we'd spend evenings watching old British sitcoms on PBS like Keeping Up Appearances. I can still hear the sound of her laughing at the Bucket woman when she'd say "it's pronounced bouquet" in a British accent, when it was clearly spelled Bucket.
In many ways, my hip replacement is not my grandmother's hip replacement. The technology and surgical techniques have advanced a lot in 24 years, so much so that I walked after waking up from surgery (with a walker, but still, walking on my new joint), and I didn't stay in the hospital, I went home the same day. I dont have nearly the restrictions on movement that she had and I will recover to walk and do a lot of things for myself much faster. Also, my grandma didn't have a smartphone or an internet full of hilarious cat videos to distract her if she woke up in the middle of the night. Nor did she have Myq Kaplan's substack which is why I'm writing this now because I woke up in the middle of the night as I recover.
The love from a grandma is very special and I think our grandmas had some things in common based on what I've read on this Substack. They were very loving and supportive. Though mine didn't have a sign about being nice or getting out, she had a sign, that I inherited that said, "Be reasonable, do it my way," which is a tongue in cheek joke for both of us as we were/are both very logical and thoughtful people with strong opinions.
Anyway, I just thought I'd share that about my Grandma Marie. I think she would have gotten along with Grandma Iris. Maybe they're hanging out, drinking tea in the afterlife.
This is beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing it. I love “Be reasonable, do it my way.” I think Iris would have loved it as well. Grandma Marie sounds wonderful. The only reason they might not be drinking tea in the afterlife right now (the ONLY reason) is that Iris was strongly on Team Coffee. She thought tea was only for when you were sick. But maybe that applies to when you’re dead also? “You’ll find me drinking tea over my dead body!” I can hear her say. So, probably that is what’s happening, then. Regardless, thank you again so much for sharing all of this, friend. I hope your hip heals well, and I appreciate this beautiful story of love. Thank you!
Thank you for receiving! I imagine that hot beverages in the after life taste like whatever you like. I'll take hot cocoa 😁
love it!