my birthday gifts to you

Jokes And More! (my JAM)

dear friends,

thank you for being here!
i am always very grateful for you to read the words i write.
my birthday is tomorrow, and so i have curated some birth- and day-related content for you here!

FIRST, some silly jokes ¹!

A) a is for a question:

why do people say "give birth" and not "leggo my preggo"? ²

B) b is for a plan:

"the plan be Plan B" -- pirate discussing birth control options ³

C) c is for conception:

the time from when a joke is conceived to the birth of its first laugh is called the JESTation period. ⁴

D) d is for da opposite of death:

my life has been flashing before my eyes slowly ever since my birth. ⁵


NEXT, here are some ideas for ways you can help me celebrate my birthday tomorrow if you like (and whenever else you want to celebrate in these ways)!

1) do whatever you were going to anyway
(i’m not the boss of you)

2) treat yourself well
(examples could include drinking water, going for a walk, taking a nap, meditating, not meditating, whatever nice treatment means for you)

3) reach out to someone you care about that you haven’t talked to in a while. and/or reach out to someone you care about that you HAVE talked to in a while. and/or reach in to yourself (someone you care about, i hope)

4) listen to someone’s music you love⁶, or look at someone’s visual art that you love ⁷, or read someone’s writing that you love ⁸, or watch someone’s dancing that you love, or otherwise engage with anything that you love.
(if you want to. this is all if you want to)

5) donate to a cause that you care about. (care about animals? here’s the animal liberation fund. care about abortion rights? here’s a link with a lot of options. care about your money being used in high-impact, cost-effective ways? here’s givewell. lots of options! and if you donate $50 to any such cause and send me the receipt, i’ll provide you a complimentary year-long subscription to this newsletter if you wish. thanks for giving for any reason!)

6) send me an email saying something nice if you want to. it could include a fun story. or your favorite music that you think i might love. or a picture of a nice animal. or your favorite poem. or nothing. your choice!
(it would be a funny choice to send me a blank email. if you do that, it might be good to send another non-blank one to let me know about your funny choice to send a blank one on purpose)

7) get tickets to come see me do standup. (friday night this week, i’ll be at the comedy cellar’s fat black pussycat lounge’s 11pm show. saturday night i’ll be at the comedy cellar’s village underground’s 8pm show, and then on QED Astoria’s 9:30pm show. friday october 21 i’ll be in philadelphia. in november i’ll be back in colorado [link coming soon]. in december i’ll be in vermont. in january i’ll be in kansas city. much of this info and more coming soon on my website!)

8) get tickets to see my dear best friend Zach Sherwin’s amazing show The Crossword Show which is coming to Portland and Seattle October 19-20! i won’t be there for these but i’ve seen the show and it’s one of my favorite pieces of art/entertainment/life that i’ve ever seen. zach is the best! if you’re there or you know anyone there, act on this information!
(!!!)

9) share this newsletter with someone that you think might enjoy it
(IF YOU WANT TO)

10) do whatever you want for yourself, your loved ones, strangers, the world, me, you, us, all, whoever!
(thank you!)


FINALLY, here’s a nice piece of art below by my friend Ramin Nazer that you can look at. it’s the logo for one of my podcasts that you might know about. i love it and i love looking at it and sharing it so thanks for YOU looking at it. (and listening to the podcast any time you want also.)

and that’s all for today. thanks for celebrating my birthdayweekmonthyearall however you wish. love to you and yours and all. peace friends!

1. AND silly (maybe even unnecessary) footnotes

2. serious answers only, please. or joke ones.

3. feel free to make your own joke about "Plan Arrrr” if you wish

4. unless you’re on mirth control

5. how slowly can something be flashing before it’s no longer possible to consider it “flashing”?

6. example: watch an OK Go music video if you haven’t in a while or ever

7. check out Ramin Nazer for example if you haven’t recently or ever! his art adorns this very message!

8. for reading, i folks including ursula k le guin, thich nhat hanh, neil gaiman, nk jemisin, and more (feel free to write back and ask and i’ll provide more). also, here’s a quote from an author i like a lot:

"Double down on your best relationship.
It's the investment with the highest return."
-- James Clear