I sent you a helicopter joke, I sent you a Mr. Rogers quote, I sent you magic in the form of words that you can understand... I hope you enjoy!

A new exploration of a classic joke!

May 20, 2025

Dear friends,

I’m grateful that you are here!
Thank you for doing what you’re doing and being what you’re being.
And now for another entry in my project where I examine jokes that have stuck with me for reasons, and I also examine those reasons!

The project began with a piece about one Mitch Hedberg joke, and continues today with this classic joke, so classic that I don’t know who originated it, or if anyone knows! (If you know, let me know!)

It goes a little something like this (paraphrasing with some of my own flavor added):

In a small town, a huge rain storm is hugely raining and storming.
It starts to flood and people evacuate as the flood waters rise.
One man does not evacuate.

Someone rides up in a canoe (or your vehicle of choice).
They say “Get in! The flood waters are rising! You’ll drown!”
The man says “No, I have faith that God will save me.”
The canoer canoes off. (No time for canoodling.)

Time passes. Waters rise.

Someone zooms up in a motorboat (to his SECOND story window, let’s say)
They say “Get in! The flood waters are rising even more dangerously now!”
The man says “No, I have faith that God will save me.”
The motorboater boats off! (It’s time to motor!)

Time passes. Waters rise. The man is now on his roof!

Finally, a helicopter arrives!
”Get in! Last chance! The flood waters are super high! You’re on the roof! See?”
The man says “No, I have faith that God will save me.”
The helicopter takes off. (I mean, it had already taken off. But now it leaves.)

The man drowns.

Up in heaven, the man meets God and says something like, “Hey God, why didn’t you save me?”

And God says, “I sent you a canoe, etc.!”

(Etc. = “I also sent you a motorboat and a helicopter!”)

A canoe.
A motorboat.
A helicopter.
All of those came. But the man was waiting for God to save him.

So interesting.
Did he want the person to say "God sent me"?
Did he want a giant hand to come from the clouds?
Did he want God to part the seas so he could walk to safety?
(God's been known to do that.)

I believe that whether or not YOU believe in a particular God, you can probably get on board with the man getting on board one of those vehicles.

A reasonable person who DOESN’T believe in God might say this:

”God's not going to save you.
That person is going to save you.
Get in that boat!”

A reasonable person who DOES believe in God might say this:

”God IS going to save you.
In the form of that person who is doing the Lord's work.
Get in that boat!”

One thing about this joke that's super funny to me is that after this guy dies and goes to heaven, he meets God and the first thing he says is a complaint:
“Why didn't you save me?”

He's complaining to God IN HEAVEN. PARADISE. THE AFTERLIFE, CONFIRMED.

And he's complaining about not getting to spend more time on Earth?

The world view of this joke: Earth is pretty sweet.
Or at least, we’re definitely* here on Earth together, so let’s appreciate it.
Let’s enjoy it as much as we can.

Do you know what I mean?
There are people who believe in heaven that are afraid to die.
Or at least, there are people who believe in heaven that still want to spend as much time on Earth as possible before they die.

The man in the joke was in HEAVEN.
In heaven AND complaining he didn’t get to spend more time on Earth.
Which is why I have assessed that this man felt that Earth was pretty sweet.

* I use the word "definitely" loosely.
It really SEEMS like we’re here on Earth, at least.

An interlude, or maybe the point, or A point:

Words mean what we agree they mean.
Words like “here” or “Earth” or “God” or [insert your own words here].
Words don't have any power beyond what we agree that they have.

There are letters that could go together and not mean anything, like “pgtvwn.” Maybe that means something in some language, but for sure there's some combination of letters that wouldn't mean anything in any language.
Only when we put them together in orders that we agree mean something do they mean something.

My friend Dylan Brody is a hilarious comedian and a beautiful story-teller, and he wrote this to me once in an email:

”I believe jokes are powerful spells and they only work if you say the words in the right order and the right rhythm. Y’know?”

I know!
And even further…
I believe that WORDS THEMSELVES are powerful spells in that way.
SENTENCES are.

Sounds work together to become words that have meaning.
We humans work together to create (or curate) that meaning.

Sometimes when people don't like to “use the Lord's name in vain,” they use different words, and it's pretty fun to me.
Instead of "goddammit," they'll say "gosh darn it" or my favorite "dad gummit."

Some folks won't even write or type the word "God," opting instead for something like "G-d."

Because to them, the Lord's name ("God") is sacred.

It's interesting to me that folks are acting like God's name is literally “God,” because those letters and those sounds are ALSO just ones that we decided represent that thing. The thing that is God.

Now, I don't mean to be disrespectful.
I think the original motivation behind these linguistic moves is positive. Because folks want to be respectful of what they find sacred.
They hold God's name to be sacred, because they hold God to be sacred.

I want to be respectful of what is sacred also.
I think that everyone is.
I think that everything is.
(Including disrespect? By my own logic, it must be so!)

My word.

”My word” is another thing people say sometimes when they don't want to say "my Lord."

Oh my God.
Oh my Lord.
Oh my Word.

The word "Lord" is sacred so some folks substitute the word "Word."
The word “Word.” Bird is the word? WORD is the word.
Super on the nose. (On the KNOWS? I'm a bit of a WordLord.)

My name, Kaplan, comes etymologically from "chaplain."
A chaplain is a religious leader, like a minister or a preacher.
Someone who speaks passionately about what they believe.
That is the spirit of the letters of my name.

Even though I love playing with letters, I think their spirit is more important.
It doesn’t matter to me what words or spellings we use.
I think that what makes something sacred or respectful or meaningful is our intention for it, our shared understanding of it.

Sounds and letters don't mean anything until we intend them to.
Sounds and letters team up with US and meaning arises.

The same way that the people in the joke team up as the flood water rises.

I believe that if God is anything anywhere, then God is everything everywhere.
And even if the word “God” doesn’t do it for you, perhaps you can still understand the spirit of those letters.

In the joke, the point is that God is in all those people and vehicles trying to help.

Canoe is God. Canoe person is God.
Motorboat is God. Motorboat person is God.
Helicopter is God. Helicopter person is God.
(God, the ultimate helicopter parent?)

Another point of the joke (to me) is that this guy DOESN'T see God everywhere, and that's his foolish, fatal mistake.
Good news though, he ends up in heaven anyway!
(A message I like!)

Though he could have been enjoying seeing God everywhere if he wanted to.
In those vehicles.
In the people operating them.
Also in everyone and everything else around him probably.

We can do that. If we want.
We can be grateful for everything everywhere.
We can certainly be grateful for all the people who are trying to help.

"Look for the helpers,” said Mr. Rogers famously.

And let me add this, Mr. Rogers, if you don’t mind (I think it might help):

When you can, also BE the helpers.

Look for the helpers when you need help.
Be the helpers when you don't need help.
Hell, be the helpers when you DO need help, if you can.

I’m glad that you’re here. It helps.
Thank you for being the helpers. I see you.
Thank you for helping to save everyone that you can, from yourself on up.
You are doing the Lord’s work. (And you don’t even need a helicopter to do it.)

And now, because I like sharing my own jokes, I share some of my own jokes:

A) is for Atheist:

A lot of atheists are doing the Lord's work.

B) is for Belief:

Some people believe that using the Lord's name in vain is to be avoided, but “in vain” means “without success or result,” so whether you’re using the Lord’s name in vain depends on whether you successfully get a result from the Lord, so at least PART of that is on the Lord, it seems.

C) is for Crickets:

Some folks, to avoid saying “Jesus Christ,” will say “Jiminy Cricket(s)”!
Which is pretty fun because Jiminy Cricket represented Pinocchio’s conscience.
WWJD? What Would Jiminy Do?

Bonus fun: crickets represent silence to a comedian.
If a joke doesn’t work (you’ve told it in vain?), crickets.
The comedian’s conscience?

And that’s about all from me! What about from YOU?
Here are questions that you can answer in the comments, or in email, or in your head, or in your heart, or in your spleen, or not at all!
Dealer’s choice! (You’re the dealer! What’s the deal with choices?)

1) How are you doing? What is new and good? How is your heart?
2) Had you heard this helicopter joke before?
3) Any favorite classic old jokes like this that you enjoy?
4) Do you think the man would have gotten in if it were called a HEAVENcopter?
5) How are you doing NOW?

Arty Har-Hars

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